Don't Make This Mistake...

The biggest mistake you can make 

is to do nothing because you can only do a little.

Don’t second-guess yourself.  Even the littlest gifts add up over time to make a big difference.  Do the thing that you've been wanting to, but haven't because you don't think you can do enough.  The biggest mistake you can make is to do nothing because you can only do a little.

Don't Give Up!

Success does not mean never giving up.  It means always finding a  reason to start a new beginning. 

All of us, at some point or other give up.  In our head (or maybe out loud) ,  there is a sad defeated *Sigh* and the thought 'I give up'  drops in.  It might be for a day a week, a minute or even just a fleeting second.  But at some point, we all experience that "I give up" feeling.  And it's okay.  I think it's normal.  It's good to vent your frustrations, to let them out and not bury them inside.  But it's even more important to keep finding a reason for a new beginning. 

I gave up.  I did or didn't do ________.  But this is Labor Day weekend.  Which means Tuesday is a new beginning.  How many things start 'The day after Labor Day'?  It's a new beginning.  Or maybe October 1st.  It's the first day of a new month.  Maybe every Sunday is a new beginning.  Maybe Monday.  Maybe Friday because it's the beginning of the weekend.  Maybe...it's the middle of an unremarkable day and your new beginning is just a random point in the day.  The point is to seize those new beginnings.  Enjoy them.  Pat yourself on the back for finding them, for starting anew, and for not letting the 'I give up' feeling to linger and defeat you.

New beginnings are fun.  They are exciting.  They are motivating.  Why wait for January 1st or some other far away time to start over?  Find a reason to start a new beginning today and do it!

Note: I had this post written, and stumbled upon the quote below posted by @monicaricci on Twitter.  I love when perfectly timed things like that happen!

 "You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, 

for this thing that we call 'failure' is not the falling down, but the staying down."

~Mary Pickford
1893-1979, 

Actress and Producer

What are you waiting for?  Start now!

#HelloMornings

I love a pretty pink sunrise.  

Every once in awhile, I get really motivated, get up really early.  I usually make this rather long list of things to accomplish, but because I'm basically alone while everyone else is asleep (and no one else is up on FB or Twitter to distract me),  I usually get almost all of my list checked off before the house comes alive.  It's a wonderful feeling.  I feel great all day.

My point in telling you all of this random information about me is a challenge I found through an online friend (one whom I really wish I were going to get to see IRL in October, but that's another story...).  My friend Michelle is hosting a Maximize Your Mornings challenge through her blog.  The idea is to get up a little earlier, get in some quiet time for meditation or prayer, get in a little exercise, and start your day off in a better way then just rolling out of bed at the last minute and scrambling to get started.  This is a super easy challenge.  Not wake up at 4:30 or anything crazy.  Just: Step #1: Get out of bed.  That's it for the first step.  Five minutes earlier.  That's all.  Baby steps, easy goals, no burnout.  I thought: "Piece of cake...I won't have any trouble with this.  After all, I do it occassionally anyway."

Boy, was I wrong!  I have seriously struggled these last two weeks to just get out of bed.  I'm not sure if it's a mental thing, knowing that in 10 more days school starts and I'll have to be up EVERY day early, or if I've just never accepted how lazy I am.  Either way, I really need this challenge!  I don't do well at all if I get up when my boys do.  I end up grumpy and irritated that I didn't get any 'me' time.  I'm not glad to see them because I'm not glad to be out of bed yet.  When I do manage to get in that 'me' time at the beginning of the day, it changes my whole attitude and outlook.  I'm glad to see the boys when they wake up.  I'm happy to have gotten some easy chores already out of my way.  I'm looking forward to the rest of my day, because it's started out so peacefully.

Best/worst day of the challenge so far?  The other morning, I had my plans laid out for morning time, had my yoga mat laid out, my journal open, my alarm set.  I was 100% prepared to wake up and have a great morning.  But, when that alarm went off, I was tired, grumpy, my asthma was bad, and my head hurt.  "Forget it," I said to myself and rolled over.  But that alarm also had a reminder note: "sign up for swim lessons".  And I just couldn't let it go in my brain.  There are only 4 spots!  What if we don't get in?  So, I dragged my aching head into the office and signed up for fall lessons.  And then I tweeted something like "#HelloMornings: I'm up but going back to bed.  #Cheating, I know."  My brother replied back later that day: "I don't know what game you're playing, but if going back to bed is cheating, it has stupid rules."    I laughed so hard at that!  He was right, of course.  Nothing wrong with going back to bed once in awhile, especially when you're not feeling well. 

Now, thinking back to that reminder that dug it's way into my brain and wouldn't let go, I'm thinking maybe that's the answer.  I'm going to try putting a little message to myself along with the alarm.  "Go on, get up...you'll feel better when you do."   Or maybe, "Don't miss the chance to start your day with a little peace and quiet."

If you're doing the challenge along with me, I hope you're enjoying it too.  If you're not a morning person (I am definitely NOT), I highly suggest you give it a try.  It's a amazing how good you can feel once you're up and going.

May you be blessed by quiet

and peaceful mornings!

Being Sneaky...In a Good Way!

So, I did something really, really sneaky this week.  I heard something.  I thought "I could help with that".  I decided I would help with that.  But I just wanted to do it, not explain it, or take credit for it.  So I decided to do it anonymously.  I told no one, just did it.   I'm hopeful that I will see the a tiny glimpse of the hopefully positive impact this thing had.  But if not, I know it was good enough, and that makes me happy.  Period.

But today, another result of this thing, completely unexpected, snuck up on me and smacked me in the face with happiness.  Truthfully, I had even forgotten I did this thing.  Then, someone indirectly related to this, (I asked person X to do thing Y for person Z, and made it possible.....can you follow that?), person X, found out what I did.  Not that it was me, but just what I did.  And this person was blown away.  I just happened to be there to see the reaction of this person to my little random act of kindness. My intentions were to spread happiness to person Z.  I had no idea that the goodness would also touch person X, and T, U, & V.  How cool!?  And I'm not mentioning this here to toot my own horn.  Really, it was a small thing I did.  I hadn't planned on saying a word, but now that I see how many other people it touched too, it is so exciting!  You've just got to try this for yourself!  And I think being anonymous it the best part.

Pay it forward, people!  It's so fun!

Embracing Life...Cherish Even THIS Moment

Awhile back, my friend, SomeGirl, posted about the purpose of her blog.  She has a very clear vision and purpose, and it fits wonderfully with her blog.  (That's the point of having a purpose statement, right?)  She made me think about this blog of mine,  (she's always making me think, and I love her for it...)  and the only thing I could think of in my purpose for it is that it's for me  to whine to think about how I'm trying to balance things in my life so that the important things keep from getting neglected.  I don't want it to be all about me.  I want it to have a larger purpose, and I hope that something from it helps someone else out somewhere along the way.  But I've been at a loss as to figuring out just how to do that.

Until this weekend, that is.  Several things all happened that helped me realize what I really want this blog to focus on. (And I started to write out all the details, but it was just going to be waaaayyyy to long for you to read, assuming anyone is reading, right?  So, I'll just skip to the point.  If you really care to know the details, I'll be happy to share them, just ask.) 

I want this to be about EMBRACING LIFE.  Cherishing each and every moment, no matter how big or small, awesome or awful.  Yes, even THIS moment, when my kids are screaming at each other, and making an awful mess, and getting-on-my-very-last-nerve.  THAT moment is as important as all the good ones.   Because it's the not-so-great moments that show us the true beauty and miracles of the great moments.  

Life can end, or change radically, in an instant...

for me, for you, or for someone we love. 

Life is a gift.  

Don't waste it.

.

Kicking That Mean Girl's...You-know-what

So, 40 days of yoga.  I'm looking at that now with only 1 day down, and 39 to go, and it sounds daunting.  What was I thinking?  I am so already sore from just last night's kick butt Hatha Fusion practice.  It was great.  It was HARD.  It was exactly what I needed.  But that mean girl in my head keeps saying "You can't do this.  What a stupid idea.  You'll never follow through with it... Who do you think you are, anyway???"

Which brings me to the point of this post.  Excuse my language, but I am going to kick that mean girl's ass.  Seriously.  40 days of yoga.  40 days of telling that mean girl to shut-the-hell-up and step to the curb.  Get out of my life!  GO AWAY!

Why?  Because I realized something during a yoga class last week.  I was struggling, and miserable, and all this anger was coming out.  (It sounds weird, but sometimes in the middle of class, emotions/stuff just come out, and this time I just suddenly got SO MAD!)  So there I was, holding some pose or other, and just fuming mad.  Don't know why.  Then the mean girl started talking to me.  "This is stupid.  Why are you here? You don't belong here.  You're way too fat and out of shape.  You don't belong here.  You shouldn't be here, fat girl."  And I held the pose, and listened to her.  I even repeated it to myself "I don't belong here."  And then I realized something kind of earth-shattering for me.  That mean girl in my head isn't me. That mean girl in my head is the voice of... well, I'm almost afraid to say it because you'll think I'm crazy, but... the devil. 

Now, you may not believe in the devil.  Heck, you might not believe in God.  You might believe in part of it, or none of it.  I did.  I used to not believe in any of it.  Then I believed that there was something bigger, but it wasn't God.  Then I believed in God, but not about Jesus and the resurrection.  Then I believed in God & Jesus, but not the devil.  Until one day I heard something along the lines of "If you believe there is good and evil in the world, and you believe in God, and that God is good, then you kind of have to believe in the other side too, that the devil is there on the side of evil."  And so, at the risk of sounding like a looney-tunes religious nut, I believe in the devil too. 

My friends and I have had many conversations lately about our inner mean girls.  I've even said that we should talk to ourselves nicely, like the way someone who loves us, or God would talk to us.  Someone who loves us would be encouraging and supportive, not destructive and mean.  But it's so hard to shut up the mean girl!  I'm trying to be nice to myself, and do good things for me, but she won't shut up.  She keeps coming back, trying to tear me down.  And so, listening to her in the middle of my yoga practice, I suddenly had the thought... That's the devil talking.  That's not you...you're trying to make yourself a better, healthier person.  That's an evil voice trying to tear you down.   And just like that, the mean girl shut up and vanished, and the anger melted away.  Huh.  How about that.

Go out and kick some mean girl butt today!  ;)

This is Me

I had been planning to write a post about the "Real Me" when my friend Some Girl beat me to it.  She did such a good job, that it could have almost been word for word about myself.  Check it out here if you'd like to see what she wrote.  After reading her post, I got to thinking more about my true self.   I am far from perfect, but I also try to be a good person.   I slip up and snap at the boys when I'm tired or frustrated.  I spend time on the computer when I should be playing with them. I'll do almost anything to help a friend.    I swear, although I try not to.   I try to do good things. I'm impatient with, and yell 'IT'S NOT YOUR TURN!', at drivers who can't seem to figure out how to use a four-way stop.  I'm pretty good at going with the flow (except at those darn 4 way stops).  I'm selfish and want things my way. I let my kids eat sugar, drink pop, and watch TV, but I also make sure they spend a lot of time outside being active, and learn the difference between treats and healthy choices.  I have a strong faith.  I'm almost never brave enough to talk about it.  I leave dirty dishes in the sink almost every night.

I am introverted to the point of seeming rude at times.  I really wish I wasn't.  I really wish I could be more bold and outrageous.  For example, if you dyed your hair cupcake pink, I would think it was pretty cool, and secretly wish I could do something so bold.  (I think I'd go for white with pink stripes.... seriously.)  If you invite the whole neighborhood over for a cookout, I would think it wonderful and welcoming.  But I'd also be cringing at the thought of having to talk to people I don't know well.  I wish I were more outgoing.

But, take all the good and bad, and I'm happy with my life.  Not that I'm not working on improving things, and finding balance.  I am.  But I'm happy with me, right here, right now.   I wasn't always able to say that.

To Glow in the Darkness

The last couple of years, I attended the Ash Wednesday service at my church.  It was a service that I had never gone to before, and really didn't understand, but I'm in the handbell choir, and we were playing during the service, so there I was.  It ended up being one of the most powerful services I've ever attended.  But I'm getting ahead of myself.  

First, what on earth is Ash Wednesday anyway?  That was the question I was thinking in my head, but too embarrassed to ask.  I'd heard of 'giving up for Lent' but never really understood it, or the reasons behind it.  I had absolutely no idea of how Ash Wednesday related to any of that either.

Ash Wednesday is the beginning of the 40 days leading up to Easter.  This is called Lent.
According to Wiki,    People may decide to observe Lent by giving up a favorite food or drink (e.g. chocolate, alcohol) or activity (e.g., going to the movies, playing video games, etc.) for Lent, or they may instead take on a Lenten discipline such as devotions, volunteering for charity work, and so on.  Today, some people give up a vice of theirs, add something that will bring them closer to God, and often give the time or money spent doing that to charitable purposes or organizations.

I still didn't get it.  What does giving up my morning coffee have to do with getting closer to God?  This seemed like one of those odd, it's-just-the-way-we-do-it, rituals to me, until I attended that first Ash Wednesday service.  Then it all clicked.  During the service, we were all asked to write down a few things that we would like to change about ourselves.  Things that were standing in our way to becoming the person God intends for us to be.   I think wrote down something like 'not worrying so much' and 'being a better, less frustrated mom'.  (It was the beginning of my search for balance even back then before I had a name for it in my head.)

Then, we came up to the front one by one with our little scraps of paper.  And we each took our paper to the candle flame, set it afire, and dropped it in a plate to turn to ash.  Physically, visually, giving up those things we had written.  Bringing ourselves closer to God.
The service continued, and included us once again coming up to the front, to recieve the ashes on our foreheads. Again, I didn't get it.  And I wish I could remember what the pastor said as he used the ashes to draw a cross on my forehead.  It was so, so powerful.  The most powerful moment I've ever had in church.   I can clearly picture his face, and remember exactly how I felt, how I felt almost as if God himself was reaching out through the pastor to me, marking me as a child of God, but can't for the life of me recall the words.   But the message was this:  Lent is about giving up something that separates us from God.  Not your morning coffee, or an afternoon piece of chocolate.  Something bigger and more important than that.  And Ash Wednesday is the reminder when you give that up, when you turn it to ash, you rise up from those ashes, and get just a little closer to God.   At least, for me, that is what Ash Wednesday and Lent are all about.

So, what am I giving up this year?  I'm giving up the clutter and chaos in my house.   It keeps me from being as good as I could be for my family, it frustrates me, and it takes up too much of my time that I could use for better things.  Gone!  To ashes!  I commit to turning at least one pile/drawer/cabinet full of clutter 'into ashes' each day during Lent.  Check back on Easter and I'll let you know how much of a difference it's made!

But, wait!   There's more!!  Again, I'm thankful for this blog, because in writing it I stumbled across this site, spirithome.com which says:  Lent is not all about giving things up. It's also about adding good things to our lives or to others' lives -- the kind of good things that follow on what Jesus asks of us.  Click on that link for ways to add things for Lent.

I'm going to use a couple of those ideas myself.  I will:

Do acts of kindness for people daily, just because the opportunity's there

give them little tastes of God's love.

Spend time daily appreciating the beauty of nature that makes me feel close to God

(Pictures to come, stay tuned!)
Use yoga and prayer as a way to worship daily

(More about how I see yoga as worship coming soon!)

Isaiah 58:6-12 (The Message)
 6-9"This is the kind of fast day I'm after:
   to break the chains of injustice,
   get rid of exploitation in the workplace,
   free the oppressed,
   cancel debts.
What I'm interested in seeing you do is:
   sharing your food with the hungry,
   inviting the homeless poor into your homes,
   putting clothes on the shivering ill-clad,
   being available to your own families.
Do this and the lights will turn on,
   and your lives will turn around at once.
Your righteousness will pave your way.
   The God of glory will secure your passage.
Then when you pray, God will answer.
   You'll call out for help and I'll say, 'Here I am.'

A Full Life in the Emptiest of Places

 9-12"If you get rid of unfair practices,
   quit blaming victims,
   quit gossiping about other people's sins,
If you are generous with the hungry
   and start giving yourselves to the down-and-out,
Your lives will begin to glow in the darkness,
   your shadowed lives will be bathed in sunlight.
I will always show you where to go.
   I'll give you a full life in the emptiest of places—
   firm muscles, strong bones.
You'll be like a well-watered garden,
   a gurgling spring that never runs dry.
You'll use the old rubble of past lives to build anew,
   rebuild the foundations from out of your past.
You'll be known as those who can fix anything,
   restore old ruins, rebuild and renovate,
   make the community livable again.

What will you give up or add for Lent?

May you be blessed today, during this season of Lent,  

and every day.

Seeking Balance

I feel like this is going to sound like the title of an old 80's movie:

Desparately Seeking Balance

Mom seeks balance in life.  Must include children, husband, God, extended family, office paperwork, housekeeping/cleaning, exercise, prayer & meditation, healthy eating, garden/yardwork, health management for self & family, maintaining friendships, and at least a little time for herself.  Not necessarily in that order.  If you have the answer, please contact below in the comments!  

Whoooo.... No wonder I feel so stressed out all the time!  That is a really big workload for just one person.  For me, I feel like I have to always do everything perfectly.  To MY standards, which are really so high that no one could ever meet them.  So, I just set myself up to fail and not feel like I'm not good enough.  And, of course, I would never expect anyone else to reach these crazy standards.  Just me, and that mean inner voice.  As Some Girl says, "that deep, mean inner voice seems to be a voice of perfectionism… you’re not pretty enough, you’re house is not clean enough, you’re yard is not nice enough, you’re not the best, you need to be better…"  But the truth is, we are, I AM,  good enough.  God made us, each of us, to be unique and special.  Who am I to doubt his work?

and I praise you

   because of

   the wonderful way

   you created me.

   Everything you do is marvelous!

   Of this I have no doubt.

 Psalm 139:14 (Contemporary English Version)

I've been trying to work on this balancing act for awhile now, and I'm slowly starting to get a little better at it, day by day.  One of the things that is helping me is to pay attention to the little nudges, signs, and whispers that God puts for us everywhere, if we will only notice them.  These little nudges help me keep it all in the right perspective, and they help me kick that mean inner voice in the pants and replace it with kinder voice that says, "You've got this, girl.  Just keep going.  You can do it!"  A nicer voice that talks to me as I think God might.

I had a couple of these signs and messages on Sunday, in addition to my Valentine.  One, came from Facebook, of all places.  One of those little apps that my friends use, and when I clicked on it, my message said:

On this day of your life, Michelle, we believe God wants you to know ... that you are perfect as you are.  God doesn't create faulty life. No. Everything created by God is perfect, and so are you. So stop driving yourself mad with endless ways to improve, and just accept the glory of your being as is.

Now, I have to say, I read this and thought, well, that's perfect, except for the part about not needing to improve.  Then I started this post, and I'm 'hearing'  it altogether differently. Okay, okay, I hear You!  I'll stop telling myself I need to improve, and focus instead on what You want me to do.  A little bit of good mom balanced with a little cleaning house, balanced with a little prayer, balanced with a little exercise, balanced with.... Being in the moment and accepting the glory of my being as it is RIGHT NOW.

The other messages I got on Sunday were from church.  A beautiful worship song, one of my favorites, played with Perfect Timing to get me to listen more to God.  I'll tell you more about that later.  And a sermon message about 'Dropping the Weight of Stress."  Hmmmm.... am I that stubborn that you need to beat it into my head, Lord?  I guess I am.  But I hear You now!  :)

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. 

Get away with me and you'll recover your life. 

I'll show you how to take a real rest. 

Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. 

Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. 

I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. 

Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly." 

Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message)

Wow, I love this blog!  Did God just whisper the answer to my Desparately Seeking Balance question?  I think so.  And He did it with just three little words:  "Come to me."  Wow.  

 ⁸ Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?"
      And I said, "Here I am. Send me!"

Isaiah 6:8 (New International Version)

One of my favorite hymns comes from this verse, and I think that it is such a beautiful song.

Here's a version I found to share with you: Here I am, Lord 

May you enjoy and be blessed by it. 

The beginning

February 2010 - - The start of my yoga journey.  Well, I officially started at the very end of January, but life is about the big picture, and not the tiny details, right?  So, February 2010.  I took the $10 for 10 days trial period, and of course my boys start throwing up the next morning.  So I missed about 1/2 of my 10 days, but the last half was beyond awesome.  After only a couple of practices I can already see a difference in my ability, and I am feeling so much energy.  So much positive energy, and no more afternoon slump everyday.  It is such a blessing.   Yea, me! 

I feel so good going to class.  I feel GREAT after class.  I sometimes still wonder 'why am I doing this to myself?' in the middle of a class, but it's fleeting, and then the feeling of purpose and power returns.  Last night during practice the teacher commented about returning your focus to your intention if you are wondering what you are doing here.  I laughed out loud, because that was exactly what was going through my mind.  And then I focused back on my intention for that practice:  HOPE.  There is so much hope and positive energy out there if I can just choose to focus on that instead of all the things that try to overwhelm and bring me down.

So, roughly two weeks in, and I still love it, can't wait to go again.  I've tried a lot of the different class options.  Vinyasa, Hot Yoga, Hatha Fusion, Yin-Yang, and Restorative.  Each is a blessing in it's own wonderful way.

Thank you, LORD, for all my many blessings.  They are so many for just one person.  I can't thank You enough.

Percolating Practice

I've started this blog in order tell the story of my quest for balance and my journey with yoga.  You might think my choice of blog names is a little odd, and I guess it is, but it speaks to me, which is what matters.

percolate:

to become active, lively, spirited.  

to show activity, movement, or life.  

to grow or spread gradually. germinate.

prac⋅tice

to perform or do habitually or usually.

to exercise oneself by repeated performance in order to acquire skill.

All of these definitions fit perfectly what I'm trying to do, both with yoga and with seeking balance (more on that later).  'Percolating' makes me think of sitting in my grandmother's kitchen, watching her make coffee in an ancient percolator on the stovetop.  I so loved those childhood summer visits to the country, to a slower paced, oh-so-different way of life.  

And so, I chose 'percolating' for my title because I want to become active, lively, & spirited, to grow in so many ways.  To germinate (why do I love that word so much?).  In order to do this, I plan to make these efforts a habit, to exercise myself by repeated performance in order to acquire skill, not just skill with yoga, but in all the many areas I'm seeking balance.   

Here's to my Percolating Practice...  may it be a successful adventure of active, lively & spirited growth.