Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Seeking Balance

I feel like this is going to sound like the title of an old 80's movie:

Desparately Seeking Balance
Mom seeks balance in life.  Must include children, husband, God, extended family, office paperwork, housekeeping/cleaning, exercise, prayer & meditation, healthy eating, garden/yardwork, health management for self & family, maintaining friendships, and at least a little time for herself.  Not necessarily in that order.  If you have the answer, please contact below in the comments!  

Whoooo.... No wonder I feel so stressed out all the time!  That is a really big workload for just one person.  For me, I feel like I have to always do everything perfectly.  To MY standards, which are really so high that no one could ever meet them.  So, I just set myself up to fail and not feel like I'm not good enough.  And, of course, I would never expect anyone else to reach these crazy standards.  Just me, and that mean inner voice.  As Some Girl says, "that deep, mean inner voice seems to be a voice of perfectionism… you’re not pretty enough, you’re house is not clean enough, you’re yard is not nice enough, you’re not the best, you need to be better…"  But the truth is, we are, I AM,  good enough.  God made us, each of us, to be unique and special.  Who am I to doubt his work?

and I praise you
   because of
   the wonderful way
   you created me.
   Everything you do is marvelous!
   Of this I have no doubt.
 Psalm 139:14 (Contemporary English Version)

I've been trying to work on this balancing act for awhile now, and I'm slowly starting to get a little better at it, day by day.  One of the things that is helping me is to pay attention to the little nudges, signs, and whispers that God puts for us everywhere, if we will only notice them.  These little nudges help me keep it all in the right perspective, and they help me kick that mean inner voice in the pants and replace it with kinder voice that says, "You've got this, girl.  Just keep going.  You can do it!"  A nicer voice that talks to me as I think God might.

I had a couple of these signs and messages on Sunday, in addition to my Valentine.  One, came from Facebook, of all places.  One of those little apps that my friends use, and when I clicked on it, my message said:

On this day of your life, Michelle, we believe God wants you to know ... that you are perfect as you are.  God doesn't create faulty life. No. Everything created by God is perfect, and so are you. So stop driving yourself mad with endless ways to improve, and just accept the glory of your being as is.

Now, I have to say, I read this and thought, well, that's perfect, except for the part about not needing to improve.  Then I started this post, and I'm 'hearing'  it altogether differently. Okay, okay, I hear You!  I'll stop telling myself I need to improve, and focus instead on what You want me to do.  A little bit of good mom balanced with a little cleaning house, balanced with a little prayer, balanced with a little exercise, balanced with.... Being in the moment and accepting the glory of my being as it is RIGHT NOW.

The other messages I got on Sunday were from church.  A beautiful worship song, one of my favorites, played with Perfect Timing to get me to listen more to God.  I'll tell you more about that later.  And a sermon message about 'Dropping the Weight of Stress."  Hmmmm.... am I that stubborn that you need to beat it into my head, Lord?  I guess I am.  But I hear You now!  :)

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. 
Get away with me and you'll recover your life. 
I'll show you how to take a real rest. 
Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. 
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. 
I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. 
Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly." 

Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message)

Wow, I love this blog!  Did God just whisper the answer to my Desparately Seeking Balance question?  I think so.  And He did it with just three little words:  "Come to me."  Wow.  

 8 Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?"
      And I said, "Here I am. Send me!"

Isaiah 6:8 (New International Version)

One of my favorite hymns comes from this verse, and I think that it is such a beautiful song.

Here's a version I found to share with you: Here I am, Lord 

May you enjoy and be blessed by it. 


SomeGirl said...

You have a way with words! I love the way God gave you and answer through your writing without you even realizing it! Great song, btw.

Shell said...