Wednesday, June 2, 2010

How To Feel Defeated

Have you ever had one of those days where you're just rolling along, having a normal, happy day, when suddenly WHAM!  Something slaps ya down and leaves ya feeling completely defeated?  Hopeless.  Crushed.  Beat down.  Does that ever happen to you?  No?  Well, let me give you some quick and easy tips on how to let yourself feel defeated.  It's easy.   (Warning, don't try all of these at once!  Maybe just one or two at a time...  Or, maybe hopefully, none at all! )

How to Feel Defeated:

#1  Don't get enough sleep.  Make sure that you are always just dragging along, barely making it through your day.  This makes it really easy for that feeling of defeat to just sneak up on you and knock you down.  Any little set back will do it.

#2 Don't manage your stress.  Sweep things that bother you under the rug and pretend you're not worrying about them.  Ignore them and let them all pile up on you as long as possible.

#3 Never EVER ask for help.  Don't ever let anyone know that something is bothering you.  They might do something wacky and awesome like help you out, or cheer you up, or my favorite.... PRAY for you!

#4 Keep as much chaos in your life as possible.  Keep a pile of clutter on the table (or counter top) at all times.  Make sure you never have enough laundry clean or put away.  Randomly put your car keys, glasses, or cell phone down in different places, so that you always struggle to find them.  Never, ever, ever file your important papers in any kind of organized fashion.

#5 Spend every waking minute taking care of someone other than yourself.   Put your children, husband, family, friends, neighbors, dog, postal carrier and bank teller first.   If you have time to take care of yourself, you obviously haven't worked hard enough to find someone else who needs your help more!

#6 Keep people at a distance, and avoid keeping a close circle of friends at all costs. Friends will lift you up, not help you to feel defeated.  Keep as far away as you can from anything that even resembles a friendship. 

#7 Talk negatively to yourself in your head all day long.  Tell yourself how horrible you look in that bathing suit.  Remind yourself what a stupid mistake that was that you made yesterday (or last week).  Talk to yourself even worse more harshly than you would talk to your worst enemy.

Okay, as I said in the little warning above, doing none of these things would be best!  Obviously, I don't want you to do any of these awful things to yourself.  This is my tongue in cheek reminder to myself to not let that moment of feeling defeated take over.  I had one of those today, you know.  I know, you're shocked.  You'd never have guessed, right?  It was related to a certain four year old that I'm madly in love with, but who is having certain issues that fall in the TMI category.  So, after, another blankety blank blank accident incident, I just felt completely defeated. And I tweeted it.  (The feeling defeated, not the TMI...)  Within moments, my super awesome, can't wait to meet her in real life, twitter friend tweeted this back to me:
Fear not!  
Whatever it is, I'm sure it's going to get better. 

JamieAnne, you have no idea how much better that tweet made me feel!  It made me cry. (I'm tearing up now writing about it.)  How wonderful is it that we can make friends and support each other, across time and space, without having ever met?  Pretty neat, I think.  Thank you!

Just one more note, and then I'll be done, I promise.  About #7, talking badly to yourself?  I read this post earlier today, "You Are Much More Than Your Bathing Suit".   Appropriately, it was right before I headed out to the pool for the first time this season.  Let me tell you, this lady has the right idea, the right attitude.  There is always a positive way to look at something.  It sometimes takes awhile to figure out what that might be, but it's there.  Look for it.  Search for it.  

Don't give up until you figure out what the positive is, and use it to crush the negatives into submission. 


megan said...

oh man... that was my day yesterday! I was in the most defeated of funks after talking to my dad and hearing how sad he was and after a combo of numbers 1, 2, 3, 5 and 7. And then I actually *gasp* reached out for help and your brother was AWESOME! He totally just let me cry it out and then made me laugh. In fact, I want to write a blog post about that. Anyway, yeah, sorry you were bummed and I'm glad that twitter AND the fact that you're going to have to put up with me for a week starting tomorrow. OH! And I'm going to bring my bathing suit. Just FYI, having that adorable suit has made me feel better about myself in a swim suit. That's my advice for that.

Shell said...

Megs, so sorry you were having a bad day! But I'm really glad my brother is so wonderful to help you feel better. He really is awesome, huh?

Oh, and I forgot to blog it, but your text did come just about 30 minutes after my "episode" of feeling so down. Between you and Jamie you both perked me right back up. :) Can't WAIT to see you. I'm so glad you're coming out this way. YAY!!